Preaching Advice for young pastors: funerals – part 3

Random pastor/funeral thoughts:

  1. Spend an hour or so with the family early on – during that time, plan the service, but also let them tell you things – take notes – use some of what they said in the sermon.
  2. Always open the service yourself.  Introduce yourself even in your own church – this isn’t your Sunday crowd.  Welcome people and on behalf of the family and your congregation thank them for coming.
  3. Be in charge.  Do an order of service and give a copy to everyone.  The Funeral Director will appreciate it too.
  4. If you have guest clergy assisting, invite him or her to read the obituary and then offer personal remarks.
  5. Take a text and preach a real sermon as described in the previous post.
  6. In a traditional funeral, stand at the head of the casket as mourners pass by.
  7. At the cemetery, walk ahead of the casket to the graveside.  In some places, the pastor is expected to ride in the hearse.  Otherwise, drive behind it to the cemetery.  You are, in a sense, the “spiritual guardian” – no, I can’t explain it, but people are equating you with Jesus, walking with their loved one to the grave.
  8. Make the committal short, thank people for traveling this last mile – then, if you have a boutonniere, remove it and place it on the casket.  Then, go to each primary family member and assure them of your prayers for them and their family.
  9. If you are offered an honorarium, don’t make a big deal out of it.  Just say thank you and that it was an honor to serve.

Preaching Advice for young pastors: funerals – part 2

Here’s my advice to young pastors concerning funeral sermons:

  1. You need to develop at least five different sermons…although some can be just variations of another
      • A sermon for a saint who lived long and well
      • A sermon for a younger person who lived for the Lord but died too young
      • A sermon for a person who had no testimony
      • A sermon for a person you never knew personally
      • A sermon for a person who died tragically
      1. Those sermons, though, basically use just two approaches
          • We celebrate the victory we have in Christ over even death and our hope of resurrection
          • We point people to the comfort that is ours in Christ
          1. Not all funeral sermons can operate at the celebration level but all should offer comfort
          2. Don’t make the person’s life your text. If you can preach about our victory in Christ – make the sermon about Jesus. If you emphasize comfort in grief – make the sermon about the Lord’s willingness to comfort even in times of loss.
          3. Do use the person’s life in illustrations – include some heartwarming memory or some conversation or something that connects them to your sermon. Caution: don’t make the sermon about your relationship with the person. That does more to impress people that you’re a wonderful person than it causes them to remember that we have a wonderful Lord.
          4. Remember that a funeral sermon is an opportunity to minister to people who are thinking about life and death – and often they are people who don’t hear many sermons. If you can point them to Jesus as our hope and comfort you might move them a step closer to coming to Christ.

          Preaching Advice for young pastors: funerals – part 1

          Over the years I’ve preached my share of funeral sermons. Funerals are unique on the church calendar because they trump everything else. One time I left on vacation following the Sunday morning worship service and drove 300 miles to a commercial campground. I had just gotten settled in when someone from the office knocked on the door to inform me that I had an emergency phone call. The next day I ended my vacation and drove 300 miles home to officiate at the funeral of a dear lady who had called me “pastor.” I wouldn’t have had it any other way; still, it’s an example of how funerals trump everything else. They offer the pastor an unprecedented opportunity to minister at a level and to individuals who the pastor would have little opportunity to impact with the gospel.

          Preaching advice for young pastors: Mother’s Day

          I know I’m risking becoming the target of mothers everywhere, but I’ve got to say it: pastors shouldn’t preach about mothers on Mother’s Day. Take time early in the service. Give ‘em flowers or bookmarks or some other nice gift. Pray a fervent prayer, thanking God for moms and asking his blessings on them.

          Then…get on with the service. Don’t sing “My Mother’s Old Bible is True” and “When Mama Prayed Heaven Paid Attention.” Preach whatever you would have preached otherwise. Stick to the schedule…stay in your series, etc. After all, while “honoring mother and father” are certainly Biblical concepts, Mother’s Day and Father’s Day aren’t actually Biblical holidays. Change the schedule for Pentecost and Easter and maybe Ascension Day but stay the course for “Hallmark holidays.”

          Moms, we love you and appreciate you, but we hope you’re okay with us not building the entire service around you.

          Sirius XM, Southern Gospel, and Enlighten

          If you don’t have satellite radio in your vehicle (or listen to it on satellite TV as I do) and aren’t a fan of Southern Gospel music you probably aren’t aware of recent events. Sirius/XM is redoing their channels and, to make room for other programming they decided to kick Enlighten, the southern gospel channel, from their satellite programming. The move created a firestorm of protest. Sirius XM’s response was that the channel would still be available on their internet mix. They suggested that listeners might enjoy listening to some of the other Christian channels that feature Praise and Worship or Christian Contemporary.

          The thing is that Southern Gospel fans may be outnumbered by Christian Contemporary listeners, but the SG fans are very loyal.

          Almost by accident, XM (before the merger) created a national SG outlet that became a magnet for fans in North America. Every gospel group wanted to be on Enlighten. When Enlighten was threatened those same gospel groups told their audiences everywhere to contact Sirius/XM and protest the move.

          And protest they did. Most of these satellite subscribers joined to listen to that specific channel. If Enlighten was gone so were they. Using the Internet they informed people about this and organized to fight back, especially in the language New York executives understand: money.

          To the NY programming people there’s no difference between Contemporary, Black, and Southern Gospel so they thought they could herd all the SG fans over to one of the other channels. When people complained, they just offered them three months free to “try out” the other Christian music channels. How shocked they must have been when several responded with, “no thanks – just cancel my subscription.”

          I know this cuts both ways. There are many Contemporary Christian music fans who would just walk away if they were being herded to an all SG channel. On the other hand, CCM fans more often have a local radio solution than do SG fans. We have the largest Christian station in the country(KSBJ) here in Houston and they do a fine job. It’s unlikely that a lot of people from this area have gone to satellite to listen to CCM.

          On my last few major road trips I’ve looked for good SG stations and have been disappointed. In one case the local station was obviously an amateur operation, almost entertainingly so. In another case, they were dropping in about 4 SG songs an hour between commercials and paid programming. In my opinion those stations had the most to win in the latest satellite saga. They exist in the US southeast, which is the heart of SG. I’m sure they’ve been abandoned in favor of the non-stop music format of Enlighten.

          Anyway, it’s only because of thousands and thousands of emails, phone calls, and especially cancellations of service that SG remains on Sirius/XM today. Indeed, money talks. Enlighten has survived and Southern Gospel fans are rejoicing!

          Confession of a non-liturgical pastor

          Confession of a non-liturgical (at least in the strictest definition of the term) pastor…

          Several years ago as I read the history of Christianity I was taken with the emphasis on the public reading of Scripture – something specifically mentioned by Paul to Timothy.

          I decided that if it we’re specifically told to do so in the Bible and since it was deeply rooted in the history of the Church that I’d add the reading of Scripture to the regular order of the service. (Note: “Order of worship” is how we non-liturgicals talk about liturgy.)

          The question then became what passage to read. My first inclination was to use the passage I was going to preach from later in the service. That, though, had some limitations — really, not all preachable portions of Scripture lend themselves to the reading of Scripture in worship service.

          Also, I was still challenged to lift the Scripture, itself. If I read my text early, I was really still reading it as part of the sermon. I wanted to let the Scripture, at that point, just speak for itself and be separate from the sermon.

          Ultimately, I decided to go with at least a portion of the Gospel reading from the Book of Common Prayer. It gives us a bit of structure and a certain flow week by week. So each week a lay reader leads us in a responsive reading from the Gospels.

          I’m not preaching from it and I still don’t use the lectionary, although I’m not critical of those who do.

          By the way, sometime later I added a weekly Psalm, which I use as a call to worship. Then, more recently, I’ve added the reading of one of the wonderful Biblical benedictions to each service.

          A Biblical call to worship, a responsive reading from the Word, an expository sermon, and a benediction from Scripture…nope, I’m not liturgical, I just like to use the Bible in worship.

          Why I don’t believe in hell

          The subject, “Why I don’t believe in hell” is really just an attention grabber. What I mean is that I don’t think belief in hell is necessary for salvation. You see, I believe IN Jesus. I trust him to be my Savior and I’ve made him Lord of my life. Without him I’m hopelessly lost.

          Beyond that, I really don’t want to believe hell exists, at least as a destination for human beings. Really, I’ve tried to not believe it exists but I can’t find a way to do so without abandoning Scripture on the topic and I’m not ready to do that.

          Still, I don’t think believing in or doubting the existence of hell has any direct bearing on one’s salvation. I’m saved because I’ve believed in the right Person, not because I’ve believed all the right things. I don’t think I should use one’s views on hell as a sort of litmus test as to whether or not I think they’re saved.

          I do think that, in some very specific cases, warnings of hell can cause a person to rethink their life and turn to Jesus for Salvation from that place. If a person believes hell exists and that they can potentially go there, then offering hope of being “saved” from that destiny can have a real influence on their response to the Gospel message.

          On the other hand, if a person doubts hell exists then threatening them with hell is going to get me nowhere. They’ll probably think of me as quaint, superstitious, and hopelessly out of touch. At that point I can either spend a lot of time and energy trying to prove the reality of hell to them or I can try to prove something else to them; maybe that God loves them and has sent his Son into this world to make it possible for us to have a genuine relationship with him. I think that’s the more reasonable approach.

          My denomination believes hell exists and that people are going there. Our church Manual states:

          We believe in the resurrection of the dead, that the bodies both of the just and of the unjust shall be raised to life and united with their spirits—“they that have done good, unto the resurrection of life; and they that have done evil, unto the resurrection of damnation.”

          We don’t rejoice in that fact. We’d rather that people come to know the Lord, letting him transform their lives. We’re a lot more interested in helping people realize God’s transforming grace than we are in telling them they’re bound for hell. Again, in some cases, the warning might help a few seriously consider responding to the Lord’s offer to “save” them.

          So, I don’t believe IN hell – that believing it is a part of my being saved. Still, to “be saved” means being saved from something doesn’t it? On the other hand I believe IN Jesus. My eternal hope is in him and nothing else and no one else.

          Please note: there have been a number of nice comments to this article, but for some reason when I changed blog addresses they didn’t transfer. You can see them here.

          Common ground on Biblical inerrancy

          After a day of more watching than participating in (yet) another round of Scripture inerrancy debates on the internet I’m more convinced than ever that it’s an unwinnable (on either side) debate that, in the end, leaves people pretty much where they started, howbeit, likely with raised blood pressure. Since I hold to the established “all things necessary to our salvation” stance of my denomination, I lean away from the “if Creation didn’t take a literal 6 days we can’t believe anything in the Bible” approach. Still, I’m not unsympathetic to reading the great stories of the Bible as literally true.

          One problem I see is that those who caution against a fundamentalist inerrant position end up pointing out what they see to be “errors” in the Bible and, frankly, there’s plenty of ammunition. It’s obvious to me that the writers of Scripture generally wrote from their own limited view of the world. The Lord gave them terrific insights into how God works in the world, but, apparently, he didn’t mind it if the writers continued in their lack of knowledge of how the world works (round and not flat, etc.).

          The problem for me is that I have no interest in being the person in a debate about the Bible who is pointing out “errors.” I have a high view of Scripture and believe I find in the Bible everything I need to know to be saved.

          The answer, for me, is to decline to be a part of the debate at that level. Since our denomination believes the Bible inerrantly teaches us how to be saved I insist that the measure of its validity has to be whether or not it accomplishes its task. I firmly believe it does. To say it more simply, I think the purpose of the Bible is to teach us how to be saved and I believe the Bible accomplishes that task perfectly because its divinely inspired.

          This approach actually helps me find common ground with my fundamentalist friends. They too believe that the Bible “inerrantly reveals the will of God concerning us in all things necessary to our salvation.” They go farther than that, but at least we agree at this, the most important point. Who knows, maybe we can build on that and avoid squabbling about our differences and do something for God instead?

          Pastor’s day off and other pastor/time issues

          I have four things to say to pastors about “days off” and how, in general, a pastor spends his or her time.

          First, unless you ditch the cell phone and head for parts unknown there’s no literal day “off.” Rather, they’re just days “on call.” In this case, it’s no different for pastors than it is for many other professionals and business people. Rather, it’s just the way it is.

          Second, you’re in this for the long haul. The dedicated, burning-the-candle-at-both-ends kind of pastor will get lots of applause from some in the congregation and maybe will even be “honored” by being asked to take on yet more responsibilities at the community, district, or denominational level. It’s important to remember that some of these good people will applaud you right into the grave. If your ministry is going to last a lifetime, it needs to be run at a jog rather than at a sprint.

          Third, life is short and there’s no rewind button. Your kids (and then grandkids) grow up quickly. Your relationship with your loved ones needs attention. Also, while a quiet lifestyle is practically unheard of these days, for a person seeking God’s heart it’s vitally important. A less intense lifestyle may produce a spiritual depth that will flow in natural ways into your ministry…accomplishing more genuine ministry to others than a frantic run on some church schedule treadmill seven days a week.

          Fourth, beware of letting others set your schedule. One group thinks you need to attend every church event (years ago the ladies at the womens meeting actually asked Jackie if I was coming – after all the previous pastor had always stuck his head in the door for their meetings – she laughed and said they had better not expect me). A certain age group would be happy if you took on the role specifically given to the laypeople of the church and spent a lot of time ministering to the “widows.” Others will make you their father confessor and lock you into a brutal counseling session schedule. If you like that stuff, okay, maybe. However, the pastor needs to have a strong sense of self identity and not let others control the schedule. (By the way, I don’t think the pastor should give a detailed time report to the board for just that reason – you’ll never win because they all think they know what you’re supposed to do with your time.)

          As I’ve already mentioned, I don’t think the pastor’s situation is greatly different than that of many other professionals and business owners. I guess a case could be made that since we’re dealing with people at a spiritual level and since we believe eternity is, indeed, forever, that there’s a bit more pressure, but I’m not sure that’s actually in play at a practical level.

          Take some time off…not just for vacation time, or even a day or two a week “off,” but every day. Don’t be ashamed or apologetic. Go toss the ball around with your kids. You and your spouse go for a long no-church-business-discussed walk. Watch some TV or read a nothing-to-do-with-church book. Sit around thinking about the things of God, not for a sermon, but just so you’ll understand such things better.   In the long run, you’ll likely do more for the Kingdom that way.

          Church prayer chain options

          In the old days we used a calling list. One person initiated the prayer chain by calling, say, two people. Those two people called two more people each, and in a fairly short time the prayer request had been distributed throughout the church.

          However, by the time the prayer request got repeated and discussed four or five times there’s no telling what the poor soul at the bottom of the list actually prayed about! I guess the Lord knew and he could easily sort actual prayer need from the extra material that had been added along the way.

          Then, we got a nifty unit called a “Phone Tree.” Our folks loved it, and still do. I keep it in my office. When there’s a prayer request I record it and send it out. Everyone receives the same message. I’m also the “gatekeeper” of it. When the prayer need is for the immediate church family, and depending on how pressing the need is, I put out a prayer line right away. Otherwise, I collect the requests and try to not initiate a prayer line more than, at most, once a day. Generally, it works out that they are sent out maybe three days a week.

          When I’m going to be away for an extended time, I used to pass the machine on to someone else who handled the requests. Finally, I decided to go with one of the newer on line services for that. A couple of people in the church have the information on initiating a phone tree using the service and it works great. We use “Call ‘em all” as our backup. Anyone with a phone and the log in information can initiate a prayer line and it practically delivers all the messages at one time, rather than working through a list as our Phone Tree does. Still, the Phone Tree works great and it’s already paid for, so we use Call ‘em All only as a back up.

          A few years ago I asked folks if they’ed be interested in an email version of our prayer line and several said “yes.” I created an email group for our Prayer Line and removed their numbers from the Phone List. It works pretty good. I go to the computer and compose an email and then read the text from the email into the Phone Tree. I send the email and start the Phone Tree at the same time.

          These days I’m thinking of adding a Twitter prayer line to the mix. Some of our real prayer warriors haven’t a clue about Twitter, but, know what? Some of our prayer warriors do…and they use texting and Twitter all the time. When I recently got my new Droid X I found out that there were at least 2 other people in the church with the same smartphone…both men in their 50′s. “Talking with your thumbs” isn’t just for teens!

          One nice thing about all this is that we don’t need to be a member of a telephone prayer chain, or get calls from a Phone Tree or through Call ‘em All or receive prayer request tweets to pray. God is the ultimate Communicator and he hears our prayers without the help of any technology at all!