Random pastor/funeral thoughts:
- Spend an hour or so with the family early on ā during that time, plan the service, but also let them tell you things ā take notes ā use some of what they said in the sermon.
- Always open the service yourself.Ā Introduce yourself even in your own church ā this isnāt your Sunday crowd.Ā Welcome people and on behalf of the family and your congregation thank them for coming.
- Be in charge.Ā Do an order of service and give a copy to everyone.Ā The Funeral Director will appreciate it too.
- If you have guest clergy assisting, invite him or her to read the obituary and then offer personal remarks.
- Take a text and preach a real sermon as described in the previous post.
- In a traditional funeral, stand at the head of the casket as mourners pass by.
- At the cemetery, walk ahead of the casket to the graveside.Ā In some places, the pastor is expected to ride in the hearse.Ā Otherwise, drive behind it to the cemetery.Ā You are, in a sense, the āspiritual guardianā ā no, I canāt explain it, but people are equating you with Jesus, walking with their loved one to the grave.
- Make the committal short, thank people for traveling this last mile ā then, if you have a boutonniere, remove it and place it on the casket.Ā Then, go to each primary family member and assure them of your prayers for them and their family.
- If you are offered an honorarium, donāt make a big deal out of it.Ā Just say thank you and that it was an honor to serve.